Coming Home: Why the Word of God Was in My Backyard All Along

For the last twenty years, I lived in a world some call “new age,” some call “metaphysical.” It was a world of crystals, rituals, mantras, and endless workshops. A world where “the Universe” was supposed to give me signs, synchronicities, and solutions.

 

But here’s the thing. I never really fit.

 

I tried. Believe me, I tried. I bought the books. I took the classes. I trained myself to believe in the “power” of rituals and rocks. I spoke the language so I could belong. But it never came natural to me. Something always felt… missing.

 

I couldn’t explain it back then. All I knew was that the more I tried to convince myself I belonged in that world, the more hollow I felt inside.

 

The Uneasy Belonging

 

When you’re in spaces where everyone swears crystals heal, sage clears, and tarot reveals, you start to wonder what’s wrong with you if you don’t feel it. That was me.

 

I remember sitting in circles where people called on “the Universe” or chanted affirmations with elaborate rituals, and I’d sit there thinking: I don’t feel what they’re feeling. Why don’t I fit in?

 

And so I did what so many of us do when we feel out of step—I performed. I smiled, nodded, lit the candle, placed the stone, whispered the mantra. All the while, a deeper ache was rising.

 

The ache of knowing: This isn’t it.

 

The Search for Something More

 

My whole life has been a search. I’ve always been spiritually curious, hungry for answers, wanting to understand why we’re here and what it all means. That hunger took me into the metaphysical world because it promised insight, community, and connection.

 

But insight without truth is empty. Community without God is shallow. Connection without Christ doesn’t last.

 

I didn’t see it clearly then, but the reason none of it filled me is because I was chasing around the edges of truth without ever touching the center.

 

And just like Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, I eventually realized the answer wasn’t out there—it was in my own backyard.

 

The Backyard Truth

 

The Creator. The Word of God. That was what I’d been missing all along.

 

The peace, the clarity, the presence I was longing for wasn’t in crystals, rituals, or “the Universe.” It was in Christ. It was in scripture. It was in the living, breathing Word of God that had been sitting on my shelf the whole time.

 

And the wild thing? Once I opened the Bible—not as a book of rules, not as religious performance, but as the living Word—I felt it. The truth. The connection. The home I’d been aching for.

 

The Cost of Coming Home

 

Let me be real with you: finding my way home hasn’t been easy.

 

Shifting out of the metaphysical world has felt like pushing a boulder uphill. For two decades, I built an identity in that space. I had friends, colleagues, clients—all connected to the “spiritual but not religious” lane. So to say out loud, “I believe the Bible is truth. I follow Jesus,” feels like a line in the sand.

 

I don’t know who will stay with me. I don’t know who will walk away.

 

But here’s what I do know: I’ve built strength. I’ve built muscles. I’ve built endurance.

 

Every strained step, every awkward misfit moment, every season of confusion—it was all preparation. It taught me to walk differently. To stand firm. To trust what I can’t yet see.

 

What I’ve Learned About Being Set Apart

 

When God sets you apart, it doesn’t always feel like a celebration. Most of the time, it feels like loneliness. It feels like loss. It feels like you’re out of sync with everyone around you.

 

I used to think something was wrong with me. Now I understand something was right with me.

 

Romans 12:2 says it plain: “Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God.”

 

That’s why the crystals never worked for me. That’s why the rituals fell flat. Because I wasn’t designed to conform to that world. I was designed to be transformed by His Word.

 

Why I’m Sharing This Now

 

Maybe you’ve felt it too—that ache of not fitting in. Maybe you’ve dabbled in all the “spiritual” things and wondered why they don’t satisfy. Maybe you’ve sat in circles where everyone else seems so lit up, and you feel… nothing.

 

Can I tell you something? You’re not broken. You’re not behind. You’re not spiritually tone-deaf.

 

You might just be chosen.

 

And chosen women? They don’t fit in everywhere. They’re set apart. And set apart always feels lonely before it feels holy.

 

A Word for the Ones Who Stay—and the Ones Who Don’t

 

As I share this shift, I know not everyone will stay with me. Some will unfollow, unsubscribe, step back. And that’s okay.

 

If you choose to go another way, I wish you love. If you choose to stay, I welcome you to the porch.

 

This isn’t about proving myself right or anyone else wrong. This is about obedience. This is about truth. This is about walking the road God has laid before me, no matter how it looks from the outside.

 

Coming Home

 

After twenty years of chasing, searching, and performing, I finally came home to who I really am: A woman of God. A follower of Jesus. A seeker anchored in scripture.

 

The Bible is not just a book on my shelf—it’s the ground under my bare feet, the compass in my hand, the light on this porch.

 

And if you’ve been aching for something more, if you’ve been searching high and low and still feel empty, let me tell you: the truth is closer than you think.

 

It’s not in the next ritual, the next rock, the next revelation. It’s in the Word of God. It’s in the Creator who never left you. It’s in Christ who already called you.

 

I came home, and I finally know who I am. And sister, you can too.

 

If you’re longing for a place to talk about real faith, without the hype, come join me on the porch.

 

REGISTER HERE

With Love,

Vee